Hey, Masturbater
               (sung to the tune of the Macarena)
  Sitting in my house, and I know that I'm alona,
  Feeling kinda horny, got a jingle in my bona.
  Go and grab a Penthouse its the one with Sharon Stona.
  Hey Masturbata:

  I go a little faster and its feeling kind of nicea,
  Once ain't enough so I have to do it twicea.
  If you wanna spank the monkey I can give you good advicea.
  Hey Masturbata:

  I use some baby oil or a little Vaselina,
  Laying down a towel so I keep my carpet cleana.
  Never shake my hand cause you don't know where its beena.
  Hey Masturbata:

  I do it in the car when I'm driving down the streeta,
  One hand on the wheel and the other's on my meata.>
  I can't get out the car cause I'm sticking to the seata.
  Hey Masturbata:

  Since I was a kid I have been a Masturbater,
  choke the chicken, hum the knob, squeezing the tomata.
  I've looked at Ms. November now I'm gonna decorate her.
  Hey, Masturbata:

  Buffing the banana, Mr. Lizard shaking bacona,
  Pounding on the flounder and its mayonnaise I'm makinga.
  Spank the frank, wax the carrot, god my hand is a achinga.
  Hey, Masturbata:

  Whewwww.....