Drunk Irishman

It was a rather loud disturbance in the wee hours of 
the morning outside the pub...An Irishman (Pat, of 
course) wandered back and forth on the sidewalk
into the street; onto the sidewalk and back into 
the street in front of the pub, hollering and swearing 
as he stumbled back and forth while holding half
a pint in one hand and a key in the other... A small 
crowd begins to grow and, finally, the constables arrive 
on the scene. 

Seeing that what they were dealing with is one rather 
inebriated and irate young man, one approached him and 
asked, "Can I help you lad?" "Yesss, schur," the Irishman 
slurred, "sshumbody stoll me car!" 

"Well now, lad," the constable inquires.  "Where was your 
car last time you saw it?" Waiving his hand in the air in 
front of him, as if to put it into the ignition, the 
Irishman said "Wey, it was at the eind of me key." 

At about this time the other cop has noticed that the 
Irishman's zipper is down -- and it's all there to be 
seen..., so he quietly asks, "Are you aware that you are 
exposing yourself?" 

The Irishman looks down, drops his shoulders woefully and 
moans "OOH ME GOD... they got me girl too!!!"